to tell you the truth - i'm not even sure what's happening. i don't know what's going on and certain things are killing me.

i don't even know what to freaking say. i can't explain anything because i don't even fucking know.

you're right - it's how they deal with things. why the hell can't i figure out how to explain everything to them? or anything at all....

i think i was right, smothering. bothering. annoying. i can't help but feel i'm pushing this away and it is beyond tearing me apart.

how can i possibly leave this alone when i can't live without you?

but for now i'll just hold the tears in, grow up, and accept the fact that i make things worse. i know it will be better to figure things out without me, which is why i won't constantly smother you anymore.

Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up
And I give up
I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

i'm not sure what to do.

I'm sick and sunk and I blame myself,
cause I make things hard and you were just trying to help.
I got no gas.
Winding out my gears.
This is one more day on the verge of tears.
And now my head hurts,
And my health is a joke.

i am so fucking sorry.